What can I do to get pregnant? How can I move God to heal me – to make me fertile? Tell me what I can do! How do I walk that path from infertility to fertility? Do I have to fight for it?
These are questions I have encountered in my own process of trying to conceive. By nature I like to know what I have to do to achieve a certain result. I learned from home that if you work hard enough for it, you can achieve what you want. I was always trying to do my best to meet my own and other peoples’ standards, but does that also work with getting pregnant and having a baby?
When I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility, I remembered the story of Abraham and Sarah. Of course I knew this story, but how long would I have to wait and get a manifestation just like Sarah? I went to search in the Bible for scriptures in the field of infertility. I have heard preachers preach about proclaiming the word of God, but what I failed to realize then is that it does not stop at just proclaiming; that proclaiming was just a fragment of the whole. Also I was proclaiming for the wrong reasons, I thought that by saying these scriptures loudly and proclaiming them that I could get God to change His mind and give me my miracle baby, lol.
What I discovered during the early period of my diagnosis is that I went after the miracle first instead of proclaiming to seek revelation and wisdom from God, and truly understanding who He is. I wanted to move God to do something for me, not realizing that it had been done already. I started proclaiming (as I had been taught and on which my belief was based) as much as possible even when tiredness and exhaustion sets in. This continued until I got totally exhausted. Not getting my desired results led to more frustration and feelings of failure, and I became angry with God.
Logo versus Rhema
What I have learned in my years of waiting is that it is very important to have a PERSONAL revelation about what is written in the Bible concerning you. Knowing scriptures about God’s will for you to become a mother and have children is not enough. God has to speak to you personally about your situation through his Word. There is a difference between knowing God’s word ( Logos ) and knowing how this word applies to you personally ( Rhema ). You would have often heard of scriptures like “with God nothing is impossible” and therefore know that God is able to do all things, but what is needed to make this word penetrate from your head to your heart and thereby make it real in your situation is a personal revelation of the word through the Holy Spirit.
I know what I want and I want it now!
Today we live in a microwave society: if we want something, we want it right away! That’s how it works for me usually because am not a very patient person, but it takes time to let God’s word penetrate from your head to your heart, to resist doubt and disbelief, and to renew your thoughts with what God says about your infertility situation. It also takes time to sustain this.
Renew Your Thinking
What we are allowed to do, and what I want to encourage you to do, is to constantly renew your thinking with what God says about your situation, until it penetrates into your heart and you cannot help but live out this truth. Paul said we should not be conformed to the world, but be reformed by the renewal of our thoughts (Rom 12: 2). In other words, you have to stop thinking according to the thinking pattern or scheme of the world. You have to accept the truth of God about your life: that you have been made fertile, and let it be strongly rooted in you that it is His will for you to have children and that the price for infertility has already been paid by Jesus.
How do you change your thinking? By meditating on God’s word. Yes you read that right; meditate! Nowadays, meditation is mainly used in Buddhism and yoga, but the origin of meditation is in the Bible. Thus God said to Joshua: “Don’t let my words disappear from your lips, but meditate on it day and night” (Jos 1: 8). Here you can see that meditation is a continuous process, and not just a one off thing. We do not meditate on scriptures just to get something to be done, but to renew our thinking to what Jesus has done for us and to view our situation through those glasses of the finished work of Jesus. This places you in a position of peace and grace.
Personal Revelation Brings Peace
Once you have received a personal revelation about your situation and you believe the Bible above all your circumstances (example, what the doctors said about you) then it becomes easier to get into a position of rest. A position in which you do not have to strive or beg God for a pregnancy / baby. This is because God would have personally spoken to you about your condition and also given you the wisdom to make necessary adjustments. Personal revelation brings peace, and you remain unfazed no matter the outcome of the situation. The peace of God would make you hold firm to the truth (the word of God), and you won’t be so quick to let go of it and step back into the old pattern of thoughts. God’s word will then be the substance that you hope for and a proof of what you do not see yet in the natural” (Heb. 11: 1).